Taking your children out to do the grocery shopping or run errands can often be a huge stressor for parents, out of fear that they will misbehave and cause stress, anxiety or embarrassment. Many of us would rather leave the children at home rather than risk a meltdown in the local Tesco. But sometimes there’s no other option and most of us at least would like to have the choice without fearing the worst! We have put together some tried and tested tips that will help significantly reduce the chance of misbehaviour and ensure smoother outings with your children.
1. Set Clear Expectations Before You Leave
Before heading out, have a calm and clear conversation with your child about what’s expected of them. Use simple language and be specific: “We’re going to the shop and I need you to stay close to me and use your inside voice.” Discuss any consequences for misbehaviour before you leave, so they know the boundaries in advance.
2. Keep Them Engaged
Boredom is a common trigger for misbehaviour. Keep your child engaged by involving them in the outing. Give them small tasks, like picking out items in the shop or helping to push the shopping trolley. If you’re in a waiting situation, bring along quiet activities, like colouring books or small toys, to keep them occupied.
3. Try to Plan Around Their Needs
Timing is everything when it comes to preventing misbehaviour. Try to schedule outings around your child’s routine, and try to avoid trips when they’re likely to be tired, hungry, or overstimulated. Bringing snacks and drinks can also help keep them satisfied and less likely to act out.
4. Offer Choices to Empower Them
Children often misbehave when they feel powerless or frustrated. Offering them choices gives them a sense of control and can prevent power struggles. For example, if you’re at a restaurant, let them choose between two meal options or ask them to pick which seat they’d like to sit in. Small choices can make a big difference in their behaviour.
5. Praise all Positive Behaviour
Catch your child being good and reinforce it with praise. Positive reinforcement is powerful; when your child knows that good behaviour earns your attention and approval, they’re more likely to repeat it. Use specific praise like, “I love how you’re staying close to me,” or “You’re doing such a great job waiting patiently.”
Bonus Tip: Be Prepared to Walk Away or Leave
If behaviour starts to escalate, don’t hesitate to remove your child from the situation calmly. A short break to cool down can prevent things from spiralling out of control. Let them know that you’ll return once they’re ready to follow the rules and if you need to go home so be it, the next time you try taking them out they will know that you are serious about holding your boundaries.
Preventing misbehaviour in public requires a mix of preparation, engagement, and clear communication. By setting expectations, keeping your child occupied, and using positive reinforcement, you can create a more enjoyable experience for both you and your child. With time and consistency, these strategies will help your child learn to behave appropriately in all environments.
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